Oh hello there... I'm sorry I've been so incommunicado of late.
It's just... it's gradually hitting me: how cumulatively exhausted I am after finishing my book, and finishing graduate school, and starting my new job, all in the span of ten months or so. Followed by juggling new schedules, and preK for Sprout, and long daily commutes, and book promotion stuff (which while totally wonderful, has also been completely draining.) {{ In case you missed it, this week I was featured on Balancing the Tide. And on Lesley Riley's Art & Soul Radio Show. }}
And so, the year winds down, I've been feeling compelled to really listen to the whispers at the back of my heart that are telling me to explore what self care means.
And what I'm learning is that while I know how to put myself first--career and work-wise, I'm not nearly so good at at putting my soul first... and what my soul and body crave isn't always in line what my mind pushes for, compelled by self-discipline and productivity inspired momentum.
What I'm learning is that I'm not so great at saying no. Or disappointing. Or redrawing boundaries to give space for the tender, soft, quiet parts of my soul to flourish again.
So I've been trying to do a little bit of that over the past handful of days. I've been...
- unsubscribing from e-newsletters - deleting rss feeds I no longer follow or find joy in - tying up loose ends and threads for various projects - dancing in the kitchen with T. - saying no more that I'm saying yes - Going to bed earlier and trying consistently to get more sleep - spending a lot of time giggling on the couch with my boys - relishing the little rituals that preparing for the holidays offer
I've also been focusing on returning to the two things I know always balance me: Running and morning pages. Waking up early and bleary eyed, and curling in a robe in the big white chair in my studio as the sky turns to pink. I'm still not in the habit of either, but already things feel closer to balance.
I'm curious: how do you nurture yourself when your reserves are over-drawn?